look after you.

"Sometimes you have to try not to care, no matter how much you do, because sometimes

 you can mean nothing to someone who means so much to you. Its not pride. Its self-respect."

There are so many human beings out there who subconsciously set themselves up for what leads them into a pit of sadistic self-destruction. Whether in love, friendship or between family members people are too kind and most of the time its not even a cruel surprise but an expected repeat.

This isn't to say I don't believe in second chances, I do. I would even go as to far as to venture to third or fourth chances but once the relapses occur on a questionable basis I would define the behaviour as serial. Booking it as a threat to ones self respect and thus challenging the respect one commandeers from the people who care for one's well being.

If you lay your hand on a searing stove plate, your flesh fries. You would not do it again, let alone a fifth or sixth time. So why return to a place promising only continuous emotional illness?

Having personally experienced this hell, I understand the unique mixture of guilt and hope that roots one's feet beside theirs and the blasphemous insecurity weighing your soles down. Alas, considering (nearly) everyone has at least ten-fifteen people who love them, why is it necessary to hungrily seek love from someone who only hands it out accompanied by knives to your soul?

Here's my take; it is a psychological flip which makes the fault yours and the duty yours. The foolishness is a human bonus that makes you crave what you can't have; acceptance from an arse-hole.

Everyone has some good in them and people can change but chances are your life will flash past you while you blindly dig for something that might not even be there. Sometimes being selfish is the only way to preserve your sanity, your confidence and your ability to love. Always be kind, gracious and compassionate - in an intelligent way.